Observations about Neighbors -- Part 1

Over the years, I have, from time to time, sometimes been described as: 'different', 'quirky', 'marching to the tune of a different drummer' and...well, you get the picture. While these observers were ALL right, to a degree, I doubt that I am any different than most people. I just don't care if I'm viewed as a little quirky. I'll own up to that characterization. Guilty as charged. People who think that THEY are not quirky, are often the quirkiest of all...they just go to great lengths to hide their quirkiness from others. They tend to be very private and reserved...and 'stingy' with their words and expressed thoughts. They maintain a facade and they do not want it breached. They don't communicate well. It's often as though their spoken words cost money and they do not want to deplete their 'verbal account.' Sometimes it's funny to observe quirkiness in people who think that THEY have it all together....like the child who covers his eyes with his hands and thinks that he is invisible to the rest of the world.

I don't dislike people like that. I accept them for who they are, and relish the kaleidoscope of varieties that humankind is comprised of. I try to not make other quirky people uncomfortable in their chosen skins. Like you, I have neighbors who represent the entire spectrum of typical American middle-classness. My next door neighbors, to the south, Neil and Joni, are open, outgoing, generous and expressive. They tell you what they are thinking. They want to know what YOU think. They are comfortable in coming over whenever the mood or opportunity strikes them, and never have an agenda. They are wonderful people to have as friends or neighbors. We have never had neighbors who were any more open, hospitable, generous, helpful or caring. (I hope they read this...we might get some more of the wonderful things from Joni's kitchen!!!). Neil and Joni are Christians...not just in name, but every pore of their bodies exudes kindness and generosity. They LIVE their Christianity. Recipients of their hospitality come and go, every week, by the dozens. Their home is the Grand Central Station of love and hospitality. I love these neighbors! They are always baking or cooking something and bringing over part of it to share with us. Neil sometimes comes over and 'vacuums' up leaves from OUR yard that he thinks might have blown there from HIS yard! I have caught him pulling the occasional weed from my iris bed in the front yard. He's always doing things to help us or another neighbor. Neil and Joni walk the talk!

I love all my neighbors, but some more than others, and that's probably not unlike your own experiences with neighbors. I have another neighbor...I love this guy, too, and I want to tell you a little about him. His name is Randy, and he is an older guy, like me. He is from the 'old school'...in a lot of ways. He is married to a lady who has been our neighbor for many years. She lost her first husband, and when she and Randy found each other, some time later, they were married and we began to get acquainted with Randy. He wears a cowboy hat...all of the time...even when mowing his yard or planting flowers for his wife. He's usually also wearing boots. Randy is one of those guys that, when noticing that you are in the middle of a project in your yard, such as cutting down a tree, will stop what he is doing and come over to help....bringing his own chain saw. He will, without your even asking, get right in the middle of your project. He doesn't 'count the cost' in time and effort. He's there to help! If I were out of town with car trouble, and called Randy, he would drop what he is doing and come running to help. His generosity has nothing to do with me...it's all about who HE is...the kind of man that Randy is.

When I think of Randy, I smile, because he's a misplaced cowboy. He is an insurance adjuster during the day, and a 'gospel cowboy' at night, singing his way into the hearts of people around the state (and sometimes out of state). Music is one of his true loves. He has a good voice, and he used it to tell people about Jesus. Sometimes, when Randy sees me out in my yard or in my pickup, he will walk over to visit. He walks toward me with those boots and that expensive cowboy hat, and, were he to be wearing one of his pistols, he would look as though he were Wyatt Earp, heading for a showdown at the OK corral! He's a frustrated cowboy, though --- all hat and no cattle! Living in Edmond, in a neighborhood, with no barbed wire, no barns full of hay and no wide open spaces. He is better suited for the open range...100 years ago. Church attendance is not a big thing with Randy. He's not for church attendance, but he's singing about our risen Lord all the time. And he is all about giving of himself to others....at the drop of his $100 hat!

We have other neighbors -- Christians who are out of a different mold. They never miss a service of the church, and come rain or snow, they are going to that building! The sad part, however, is that for 30 years that we have been neighbors, they have nothing to do with anybody. They don't even know the names of the kids who live next door to them. They have nothing to do with anyone, never have anyone in their home...never know about births and deaths and sickness, joys or sadness in the homes about them, and for thirty years, never have anything to do with anyone in the entire neighborhood. The man is an elder in his congregation, and, to my knowledge, is a good man, married to a good woman. Observing how this older (older than me makes them very, very old!) couple present themselves to the world makes me reflect on something that has its roots in a fallacy common to Christians: that church attendance, i.e. being 'at the building' every time the doors are open is a 'be-all and end-all'. I believe that true Christianity is more of what one is 'all about' 24/7. That, I believe, is what Jesus and the writers of the New Testament say that is ones' true worship...what we spend our lives doing, thinking about, praying about---the focus, the substance of our lives. It may be difficult for any of us, wanting to live for God, while voluntarily sealed off in a cave (or house), having nothing to do with the world about us. While church attendance is very important, I have often thought that when the focus is on 'trooping back and forth to a church building' and less on living for Christ and doing for others, the focus may sometimes get out of kilter. Maybe I'm wrong (nothing new to me). Again, to quote my really smart Mom, who died in 2004, at the age of 85, 'I'd rather SEE a sermon than HEAR one, anyday!!

Anyway, here are three families of very different neighbors: One family is always at the 'church-house' and is always involved in doing for others--- very giving people. Another family is never at a church building, but is always doing for other people, and singing about Jesus. The other family is always at the 'building', but has nothing to do with the world about them, and never comes outside except to go to the church building. I will not make judgments about them -- for a couple of reasons: 1. That is God's business, not mine 2. I don't know their hearts. 3. I don't want to be
the 'pot calling the kettle black'...I have enough to do trying to live my life like God wants me to live it --- and that seems more and more to me like a full-time job.

Still, it is interesting to observe the differences in people -- I have another 'installment' about neighbors to follow soon. You'll perhaps find it interesting. It will contrast observations about two other completely different families in my neighborhood -- one family who could not care less about God and another family that lives for God...and what happened when death came to visit each of these families a few years ago. Thanks for reading my blog, and, for some of you brave folks, daring to leave a comment now and then! Happy New Year!